There were two drunks in the road as I came back from the 24hr supermarket. I walked straight past the first but the second stepped up from the gutter and glared at me.
I said hello, which momentarily confused him, and carried on walking.
‘Who are you starting with?’ he said.
‘Not you,’ I replied.
‘I’ll fight you!’ he shouted at my back. I knew that if I turned round he probably would, so I kept moving, wondering which of the two things I was carrying would make the more effective weapon – the baguette or the tin of beans.