The lad loitered in the Christmas aisles examining the kinds of calendars you usually find hanging on the wall of a mechanic’s: The Sun Page 3 Girls, one from Nuts magazine, Babes and Bikes 2012.
His girlfriend stood behind him, five-feet tall and buried inside a puffer jacket. Her nose was raw and when she spoke her voice was muffled by snot.
‘What do you like about them?’ she said to his back.
‘Dunno,’ the lad replied, picking up UK’s Hottest Babes.
‘Do you think I look like them?’
The lad didn’t hear. He’d already set off towards the tills.